Awakening of the total destruction

Nothing back can control the path i choose.
i'm standing with my own will.
came to this.. make the imba move.
nothing can stop me now for doing this kind of messing up my mind.
dont worry.
i still need a friend.
i just change my lifestyle, my attitude, my heart..
be different from past..
and yet.. no more mr nice guy. no jack's squad from me now on..
my hatred are still burning..
bye old me..

The end of the day. The beginning of another me.

Today.. I totally lost. Lost everything.. myself. my love one..
I cant bear it!
I cant take this!
I just wish to be with someone that i love..
evendo it hurt myself alot. I dont care about it! My heart my soul..
Now. im facing the end of my day.. to rise the another me.
another me that wearing the mask from very long time in my mind..
The beginning of another me..
the bad days are come near..
if i change to another me... i will never turning back again!
hate my past!
make the future with another me..
i will break this mask... and show to world. my true vassel.
that i keep long long ago..

The Mess-up!

Its time to me carry some bigger event on the grand finale.. i hope the choose i made is better for me to survive in this particular world near time..
it gonna be the ending for me or another people.. when i gave up.. i will lost all in my entire life.. i been checking twice or maybe more because i need to get the suitable plan in nearer future..

and yet.. maybe... one day.. i never be this way again..
i cant step to this same way again..
be this life..
be this thought.
be this normal..

let me be the freakiest in this world.
ugly duckling.
ugly betty.
that be nobody.

it just hard to change someone personality including myself.
being new me.. being new life..
being new place.. to show the world i CAN change!

i got nothing to do.. im feeling stuck in the middle of noway..
only god can give the light of truth to me.
i pray.. for good deeds in here and afterlife.
forgive me. im just a slave to u.